At Last.

So I’m kind of back!

Probably not but I’m here for one blog at least anyway. Just to update those who may be interested.

So im still living at home and actually love being back in my home town. It was definitely the right decision for me as I was really not happy moving away. University may never be for me but I gave it a try and im glad I had that experience and independence even if it was for only a year and now I have over £10,000 worth of student debt. I miss the friends I made up in Cheltenham  most and find it hard being so far away that I can’t just pop up and say hello whenever I like but it doesn’t mean I love them any less than when I left almost a year ago.

I have a job now in a little convenience store near me which is nice. They are a good team and I earn my own money which means with the low rent I pay my mum I am able to support myself other than what my parents help provide me with. I am very proud of where I have come. Id never had a job before I left for uni and now I’ve had two and I’m beginning to learn and understand what it feels like to really work for the money you are given and the sense of pride you get when you see the money in your bank on pay day and think, I earnt that money.

I am 21 in under 2 months which is scary. Strange things like realising I left school 5 years ago and seeing friends that are engaged or married with children of their own have stunned me. I am an adult now and no matter how much I have been resisting it I am now seen as a grown up. I still refuse to let go of my love for Disney films, fluffy toys and just general childish behaviours. Although I do now have a great love for homeware and decorating. Such as ornaments, cushions, candles, blankets and other small trinkets to place around the house. I find myself looking at crockery and furniture and planning my home out. I’ve also had a recent obsession for buying flowers and arranging them in big kilner jars in the lounge.

I wouldn’t say I’m coasting through life but I am running out of time to make a decision about what I want as a career. Do I return to uni? Do I do an apprentiship? What do I want? Focussed very much on the I part. Me, I have to choose a future that I want as I am going to be the one living it. I have realise if I want money the jobs that pay the most do require a degree so that does make me feel a little trapped  but I am unsure if I would be able to cope with returning to uni without panicking and wanting to come home again within the first term.

That’s an update anyway I’m sure I will be able to find more things to talk about as the weeks go on, who knows? I will try to keep going (as I say every time), because I do enjoy this.

Goodnight.

P.S Watch out for another post later tonight.!